Recall 3 experiences in which you’ve experienced a certain “death” or “life interruption” through any kind of loss (small or great) that shook and changed your world for you. Start with the most recent one and go back in time. Try to recall your very first Loss of Innocence or first major Disappointment.
My most recent “death” or “life interruption” was during my last job. I was working for a contract company at a local hospital in medical records. I had my own boss, but I also kind of reported to the medical records manager at the hospital. He was very well known for never doing anything himself and delegating everything, to the point that he always failed the surveys they had at the hospital.
One day he asked me to take care of something with the legal team. We had everything handled, but he didn’t bother reading his email. He started ranting and raving about getting it done nearly yelling at me. I wasn’t able to get a word in at all. Finally, when he paused, I simply said “that isn’t my job.” I was so fed up. In hind sight, it wasn’t the best way to handle the situation, but I’m only human. Everyone has their breaking point.
He contacted my boss and both she and the district manager came to me to discuss the situation. However, there was very little discussion, it was more like the district manager yelled at me the whole time. I ended up crying, went back to the office, and told my coworker the whole thing. I said I didn’t know what was going to happen, if I would be written up or not.
One of the employees of the hospital was also there, and she apparently told the medical records manager what I said, but spun it to make it sound like I was laughing it off, rather than crying about it. Then the manager contacted our VP and he came out to talk to me. He said that the district manager told me not to talk to anyone about the situation, which she never did, and said I could be fired for insubordination.
I had been there for about four years at this point, holding the team together, being one of the most productive people there. I always towed the line and tried to never make waves. I bent over backwards to make to people at the hospital happy.
It was a very dark time for me because I realized you can’t trust anyone, at least not at work, and that you can be the best employee in the world, and it won’t matter if they decide to let you go, for whatever reason.
Now I’m much more careful about what I say to people, even people who might be almost friends at work.