Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

How do you feel when everything around you is dark?

This may be the anxiety or it may be depression.  There will be times where I feel like I can’t keep doing what I’m doing.  No matter how hard I try, I get no where.

I don’t actively seek my death, but during these times I feel like if something happened to me, it would be a welcomed relief.

Yes, I know my friends and family would miss me, but sometimes life feels so unbearable.  Every little thing will make me cry.  The good and the bad.  A cute puppy video on Facebook will make me cry.  A happy ending at the end of a movie will make me cry.  People losing loved ones will make me cry.

During the darkness it feels like my go to emotion or outlet is crying.  I end up just wanting to be at home, curled up in a ball and crying.  It’s all just too much for me.

 

If you , too, feel this way, you are not alone.  I think we spend too much time trying to focus on the “good” that the “bad” seems that much worse.

During my toughest times, I try to remind myself that humans have taken over the world.  So much so that many species are endangered.  What makes me think that I’m not resilient enough to get through some stress in my life?

Granted, I’m not planning on taking over the world, but it’s something that keeps me putting one foot in front of the other when I’m dealing with struggle and depression.

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